Running Ramblings, Coffee Crazy

I don’t feel very well this morning. It’s been a queasy, uncomfortable feeling since yesterday… bloatedness?! Tiredness?! Anyway, I think it’s just that there are many uncertainties… exciting and yet fearful, looking forward and yet slightly apprehensive, expecting yet unsure… hurhur, so oxymoronic. Er… perhaps I am a mournful optimist? Faith-filled pessimist? Hahhaha… I just feel queer these days.

There have been recent bouts of beautiful sunny weather and it felt really good to soak in all the sun rays. One of the things that I enjoy the most is that after a long, hard run, my body feels alive and hot… sometimes when I am running, I feel as if I have such excessive energy and can simply run on and on… it’s so addictive and there’s such a sense of euphoria. The best part of running is that as I run, after a while, my whole body goes into auto-gear… I don’t even think and yet I do think about things… I look at the faces of the people I pass by… And if I run at the reservoir, of course I will meet other runners… Very very interesting… some struggling to take that next step, others with grit and determination written all over their faces, some simply just walking and chatting, quite a few with music in their ears… I suppose there are many like me too, that as they run, a thousand and one thoughts run through their mind, and yet, they are seemingly oblivious to what’s really happening around them.

And another most wonderful part of running is at the end of it. I like it especially more so when the sun rays beam right through my skin. I can feel the sweat dripping.. the adrenalin, the heat, my clockwork slowing down. Especially on a bright, beautiful Saturday morning at the reservoir, I will run down to this man-made platform.. and it’s quiet and serene. I’d look at the still reservoir waters and ne… I remember Psalms 23.. He leads me beside the still waters.  With my shades on, I congratulate myself for having conquered that other kilometer.. I thank God for being alive, I thank Him for all the wonderful things that He has blessed me with. I am still sweating profusely as I go through my cool-down routine… stretching, loosening the muscles and more, more stretching. Sometimes when there is no one around, I lie down on the platform, look up at the sky and just rest. Sometimes too, I look into the waters and I can see fishes and turtles.

Hahah… weird yeah… I just feel queer lar. There are also some days when I fear that one day, I may not be able to run anymore… weak knees, too busy, etc, etc, etc. On good days, I can really run but there are also many days when I feel so weary as I trudge my heavy feet through… Most times, the weariness is not so much due to physical constraints but they happen in the realm of my thought life. Hmmm… the mind is such a powerful tool… I feel that running is just like prayer.. we can get tired and don’t feel like even communing sometimes… but as we stick it through, as we breakthrough, surely just like running, at the end of it, we feel happier and more at ease. (Have you ever met someone who’s exercised and worked out hard and not feel happy and proud of himself for having crucify his flesh, beat that slothful nature? I have not. They may complain about being tired but they will feel happy for having done something good.)

Hahha… so much about the running ramblings.

I’m going to make some coffee now… hurhurhur. :)