Dare to confront

This evening - I can feel that the weather has become warmer, and while still windy, surely, it is a sign that the season is changing. Outside, I can see the trees swaying quite a fair bit; the last few days have been rainy, cold, windy. 

Yesterday, I was falling fast asleep when S returned home, and said he has something he really needed to tell me. For a brief moment, realization hits - that life truly is not in our own hands. God gives, God takes away. And for that brief moment, it was a moment of sadness. 

These few days have been pretty hectic, and I thought I wanted to say maybe this season, year, is one that could be focused on "dare to confront". Not so much about confronting externalities, but more the innermost, the hardest areas to broach. It was a very interesting last few days, with different experiences, conversations - that led me to this. Time is short; we would not have forever to decide how we want to live.

I found that as I started to pen down some thoughts on Sunday night, I started to feel a little bolder too. It was almost like there was a flurry of thoughts that came. And it was a really good conversation with Steve when he came back afterwards. Maybe too - at the back of my mind, I keep reminding myself that there in that 4th man in the fire. 

Kenji is laying at my feet now - it is a very familiar feeling. I had wanted to hit the gym, or run again today, but it is just too windy outside. 随心所欲 is also a nice feeling. 

This Tues evening, am thankful that my heart is a little stronger today. Thankful that for those things that I can't control, I can be at peace. Thankful for good friends and colleagues. Thankful for that nice, windy walk with Kenji earlier. Thankful that despite the noises, I can still fall asleep and rest. Thankful that the day has wound down as night falls. :)

TGIF

Honestly, it’s been really good that I can now say TGIF. The UAE has now aligned with much of the larger global workforce for a Mon – Fri work week, and this past Fri, is my first TGIF, and plus, it’s now a 4.5 day work week. Week 1 Jan has passed – and it was a really great way to spend my first Fri evening out with my red foldie – I did some good rounds round the stadium, had a nice long walk with K (he led me wherever he wanted to walk this time), and then had a quiet fishy dinner.

Daily this week, I intentionally choose to focus, choose the thoughts that I want to spend more time on, and for each area of importance, I tried to hone in on what really matters, and to remember breathing. I think some days, it is tough. The wild mind tends to wander off in different tangents – how can that small space in between the ear cause such disruptions to the heart and whole body? But that’s why it is also good to know that I am not the only person who feels all-over, who feels mayhem at times, but that it’s common to all men, and that’s why – the WoG continues to undergird.

I had such a lovely Sunday morning today. Went for a cold, morning run – easy, enjoyable round around the mosque, and then, went to do Ashtanga yoga at the Bridge, a new area just 5 mins away from my place, with Ildico. It was an outdoor session – and just focusing on breathing, and maintaining balance, and letting the sun rays beat down on me – that was calming and relaxing. My 3^rd time at Yoga here – first 2 were last year – aerial and moonlight, and today, I felt I could balance myself a little more easily.

And then, a random breakkie out with the kids to end the morning. How nice and lovely. They do have a wonderful appetite.

Over the past week, I can count my blessings in a few areas. For work, Shan has joined us – and that will definitely strengthen the team with her experience in marcomms. In reading, I started 2 books – Mary-Martha, and then one on brain intelligence. On keeping well physically, Grace and I tennised (though I must say it was possibly a harder session this week due to the wind), and then we had a really nice dinner at my place. Did 2 runs, a bike ride, and then this yoga. Also, spent some good time with WC and V, and their little Jasper, who came to visit and played with Kenji. It’s really been a while. These folks came together with Steve 5 years ago.

Also - some amazing end-of-year gatherings with different ones. The cold weather makes such gatherings warmer - all sorts of good food, but the most important is really the company. As we grow a year older, hopefully, we all grow a year wiser too. So blessed - the intentional catchups, the video calls, the H2H talks. 

As Jan unfolds, I pray that I will continue to grow better as a person, and that 2022 continues to be one that amazes.