New Chapter 2017

It's been a while. Maybe a decade. How time flies, and I would never ever ever imagine that I would live in Abu Dhabi. Japan, yes. Countries like US, Canada, Australia, yes... Middle East? Never imagined that this would happen.

But yes, here I am. It's been about 6 months since Steve came over. And I am here and there, between SG and ABD, and likely, will make the more permanent move in Q3 2017.

Today, I muse about many things. It's Friday. I would have been so glad in SG, knowing that the work week has come to an end, and with CG, that would mark an accomplished week, laying before the Lord everything I've done, believing for fruitfulness. And it was like that for the past 10 years, 8 years in WDA/SSG; where with the routine a normalcy sets in, where with the routine, life goes on and on - each week pretty much the same as the last, some weeks tougher, some weeks more exhilarating, some weeks very painful, some weeks in triumph.
In ABD, at least for now, it's pretty different. I reflect. I think about what would become (sometimes what could have become), what could become, and try to paint and imagine a future. I realised that I cannot rush things even if it were in my nature to do so. I learnt patience. I learn to live in the moment, and daily, I take time to thank God. I make plans, but in transitional periods like now, I don't really know how our tomorrow would become, and so, with that uncertainty would also be a certain faith and rest in God.

So I thought, perhaps I would resurrect the blog. And in time to come, journal God's faithfulness in my life, in Steve's life, step-by-step.

清ちゃんのメールを。。。ありがとう。

もうひとつの実を望まれ

主から選ばれて
この世に植えられた
もうひとつの実を望まれ

ありがとう気づいてなかった
どれほど愛されているのか
はじめから今まで神の愛は
いつも注がれていたこと

ありがとうその愛教えてくれた
主から与えられた君に
キリストの愛でもっと仕え
私もこの世に仕えよう

君は愛されるため
そしてその愛伝えるため
主から選ばれて
この世に植えられた
もうひとつの実を望まれ

帰ってきたけどまだ元気がない。。。
信頼といえばどんなことでしょうか。
まだ心の痛みがあります。
まだ痛いです。

さっきギターを弾いた。
がっかりな感じはいつも溢れている。
どうしてどうしてどうしてな言葉ばかり。
どうして失敗？
どうして夢は壊れたの？
どうして現実はそうなの？

望み

新しい役
新しい夢、幻、ビジョン
WCとの和解
心の癒し
FILの癌を治す
神様の知恵、注ぎ、フェいバ

痛み

突然悲しくなります。
突然に。
なぜ。。。

昨日は元気になったけど。昨日は起こったことを忘れたかったけど、今日はぜんぜん元気でわない。
難しいな。

GWとまきのことを感謝し、昨日二人と話した後、元気になる。自分の問題を考えずに、ほかの人を集中し、夜の時間も経ちました。

今晩はどうすれば良いですか？

Encouragement to Myself - Be Strong

Lam 3:22-33 (The Message)

^22-24God's loyal love couldn't have run out,
his merciful love couldn't have dried up.
They're created new every morning.
How great your faithfulness!
I'm sticking with God (I say it over and over).
He's all I've got left.

^25-27God proves to be good to the man who passionately waits,
to the woman who diligently seeks.
It's a good thing to quietly hope,
quietly hope for help from God.
It's a good thing when you're young
to stick it out through the hard times.

^28-30When life is heavy and hard to take,
go off by yourself. Enter the silence.
Bow in prayer. Don't ask questions:
Wait for hope to appear.
Don't run from trouble. Take it full-face.
The "worst" is never the worst.

^31-33Why? Because the Master won't ever
walk out and fail to return.
If he works severely, he also works tenderly.
His stockpiles of loyal love are immense.
He takes no pleasure in making life hard,
in throwing roadblocks in the way:

Believe within

Today I felt overwhelmed
But I will trust in God's promise.

Jer 29:11-14 (The Message)
This is God's Word on the subject: "As soon as Babylon's seventy years are up and not a day before, I'll show up and take care of you as I promised and bring you back home. I know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.
"When you call on me, when you come and pray to me, I'll listen.
"When you come looking for me, you'll find me.
"Yes, when you get serious about finding me and want it more than anything else, I'll make sure you won't be disappointed." God's Decree. "I'll turn things around for you. I'll bring you back from all the countries into which I drove you"—God's Decree—"bring you home to the place from which I sent you off into exile. You can count on it.

Happy Night

I had such a fabulous time with Steve tonight. :) He will be very happy to read this - more than knowing that he is my best friend, it's him who has set me into action, to write an entry tonight.

Sometimes, things done in an impromptu manner bring about amazing results. We hadn't really intended to meet... I was already home, and then, yeah, we decided to go to Ajisen. It's been about 2 plus or 3 years since I last went to Ajisen. In our earlier years, we frequented Ajisen and it was a dating dinner place for us, so tonight, somehow, it was special. And enjoy the ramen we did.


What I want to say is that a relationship - a meaningful, deep relationship - is treasure. To find someone who understands you, can communicate with you, gives you the assurance and confidence... the list goes on... this is truly a blessing. Tonight we just talked. If you ask me what I talked about, actually I can't really recall now, ahha, but we just talked and fellowshipped. Thank you my dear. :)

And another highlight of the night - had a long chat with Maki over the phone and she shared with me about her trip back to Japan, the church there and the Holy Spirit. I really enjoyed the conversation with her, and we prayed together. I'm so looking forward to going to the mission trip in May. I know it will be a life-changing experience, and I pray that I can continue to be a blessing to the Japanese.

It's almost 1am... and tomorrow is Friday. Have to wake up early to work, but somehow I am wide awake. Could it be the mocha after the ramen? :) Steve and I went to Starbucks after Ajisen, and had a MO JIA. I am thankful that it's Fri, and weekend is coming, cos for certain, I'm looking forward to CG and service.

Suddenly I think that life is so beautiful.:) In the cool of the night, as I type this and reflect on my bed, I thank God for all He has shown me and blessed me with. I know 2011 will be a blast year!!

Tonight is an amazing night.

After 1 whole week of work, several meetings and going out with friends and cell group yesterday, tonight is MY time!! :) It's ME time and after work, I went for a quick swim at Safra and now... I am at Minds Cafe, blogging and also sms-ing a few friends.

I seldom do this nowadays, but today, I just feel like finding a cosy corner in a cafe. Did some work and killed some brain cells, then decided to surf the internet and moment of inspiration - Write Blog!!! Haha, this blog is like a very old woman... Quiet, Slow, Aged, Lack of activity... but maybe, maybe it will change soon?!
Whahahahah.

And there's no specific blog topic. I am just happy to rant away.

I feel that it is so important to love people and at the same time, learn to receive love too. Being thankful is such a key thing in life. Tonight Steve has cell group. Just now he called me... i think they are eating KFC? (maybe my ears heard wrongly... wahhahaa..) I sort of miss him this week... cos we din meet up lar..

And tomorrow is Kelvin's BIG day!!! I am truly happy and excited for him. If you dunno him, you can find him in some past pictures in this blog. Can't miss him. Besides Steve, he is the next most handsome brother E151, N432 has ever produced... ahhaha... and tomorrow, I know it will be unforgettable for him and Karen. Marriage bliss to dear Kel and Karen.

And one night, recently, I came home to discover a "WOO WOO WOOOOOO" sound from my bedroom. To my amazement, my sister had got an air-conditioning unit installed. She was sick of the heat at night and just decided to do it. (My mum has opposed to getting air-conditioning for the longest time as she feels it is not good for health.) But Apple decided to just do it, and now, Yay!! We are both happy sisters, have an air-conditioned room to sleep in snugly and comfortably.

And well, Minds Cafe at Safra is still bustling with acitivty. A few tables are occupied, and groups are playing games, laughing heartily at times. Only 私。。。私だけ一人自分の時間を過ごします。ふふふ。でも本当に嬉しいです。一人だけど寂しくない。私ももうすぐスティブと会う。彼のことを感謝します。：）

And the time now is nearly 12.30am.. Gosh... I am going to go home le... my batt is almost flat already. :)

I am a happy owl.

The God I know

Righteous and Holy

The God I know

Faithful and true

The God I know

My tower of refuge

Hearts are healed

Christ revealed

The God I know

Light of the city

The God I know

Strengthens the weak

The God I know

Your heart beats within me

As you are

So are we

He gives and takes away

These past few weeks have passed like a whirlpool, the most significant being God showing us how His grace and mercy is more than sufficient.
Steve has gone through one of the toughest times in his life and yet, I see him being strong.
Next time I shall call him Strong Steve.

When I asked him why he did not even tear a drop, he said, "How could I?"
When I asked him further, he said, "I have totally trusted Him. He gives and takes away. This total surrender and trust and strength in Him in me simply does not allow me to cry."

One doesn't really know the extent and depth of simply declaring verses and promises of the Bible until one goes through that immense valley.
And at the end of the day when everything is stripped away, you will know how strong you truly are as a believer.

We sang this song during FOP. And this couldn't have come at a timing more apt.
I am able to write this entry now because I know that God is a good and faithful God.
I declare that He is a deliverer and He loves us.
Even in times of loss and pain, we can always choose to bless and praise His name.


Blessed Be Your Name
by Matt Redman

Blessed Be Your Name
In the land that is plentiful
Where Your streams of abundance flow
Blessed be Your name

Blessed Be Your name
When I'm found in the desert place
Though I walk through the wilderness
Blessed Be Your name

Every blessing You pour out
I'll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name

Blessed be Your name
When the sun's shining down on me
When the world's 'all as it should be'
Blessed be Your name

Blessed be Your name
On the road marked with suffering
Though there's pain in the offering
Blessed be Your name

Every blessing You pour out
I'll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name

Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name

You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to say
Lord, blessed be Your name

???????

Fleeting moments
Tennis action
Love stories
Kungfu movies

Half an hour
20 minutes
Voices rising
Tired bodies

People running
Smelly lifts
Sister crying
Everything's messy

I am just sitting in front of the comp, waiting to use the bathroom.
Dad's inside, I dunno how long it'll be.
I just returned home and am feeling totally nothing.
It's been like that these couple of days.
I feel that I am a nothing trapped in another nothing.

Sometimes I want to write, but dun really know what to say. I don't really want to write melancholic and un-understandable posts like this, but whatever, I guess sometimes it's really OK to be totally honest with my own emotions.

Or worse still, when I dun really understand how I really feel?

I need a good, clean shower right now.

I love Saturdays!!

Hmmm, actually I also really like Friday nights, because I know there's cell group where we always have a very cosy gathering, catching up with good friends, laughing as we play games and eat together, and learning as we hear the Word.

Maybe not everyone knows what I mean... wahhaha.. and may even think it's funny?! Play games? Make it a conscious point to sacrifice personal time to meet together? But really, I truly enjoy it very much and I know I have grown through the many cell groups. I think if everyone plays a part and contribute... akin to different branches on a main vine, the whole gathering gets even much better!!

Wahhaha... but anyway, why am I talking about Friday nights when i want to talk about Saturdays?

I love Saturdays because I know I can spend more time at home, reading, blogging, having a nice lunch (no need to rush to keep within an hour time frame... wahhahaha), oh yeah... read newspapers and drink kopi... and these days, these Saturdays, it's become a fixed lunch date with Morien. Morien always meets me for lunch at the big, round market near my house!

Anyway, I will write again... soon... I have a lunch date now!

ENJOY YOUR SATURDAY!!

My Very Happy E151


My Very Hardworking Colleagues


My cosy Japanese fellowship group


My Papa, Mama, ShuShus and Ah Yi


My last date with Junko... at least for now

As I type this, Junko would have already been in Japan for 2 days. She's left Singapore to take care of her grandmother, putting aside her own dreams and ambitions. Though we have not known each other for long, I still thank God for this friendship where we can be open and share about our fears and inadequacies, and also when we encouraged each other on. :-D Arigato Junko san! またシンガポールに戻ってね。私も日本へ行く！いろいろなもありがとう。：）

Ok, this post is very short. hurhur. I just felt that it's been so long since I posted anything!! So I thought it would be nice to just give a quick update. And yeah, it looks threateningly dark outside now. I think it's gonna pour.

Wonderful News

Praise God. :) Steve received his contract from SIA today and I am so happy for him. This is indeed a wonderful testimony, a walk and journey so exciting, so timely, so planned... These last 5 months have been exciting; they seemed like chapters of an adventure book, episodes of drama unfold. I feel his joy so much, inexplicable, unexplainable, tangible as I hear his voice over the phone just minutes ago. It is indeed in God's timing.

Philippians 4:6-7
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

From Bill Farrel about his new book, Men are like Waffles, Women are like Spaghetti?

I found this quite true, and Steve and I just had waffle and some spaghetti last week too.

If you make a diagram of the way a man processes information, it looks like the top of a waffle. He puts the first issue of life in the first box, the second issue in the second box and so on. A man will spend time in one box at a time and one box only.

When a man is at work, he is at work. When he is watching TV, he is watching TV. As a result, he is a problem-solver by nature. He goes into a box, figures out the problem, assigns a soultion and then moves on.

If you make a diagram of the way a woman processes information, it looks like a plate of spaghetti. Each noodle represents an issue in life and every noodle touches each other noodle on the plate. She is, therefore, wired to connect the important issues in life and is naturally good at multi-tasking.

The italicised portion makes me laugh because I think it's so true!!

There's a bit of child in everyone of us!

森の熊さん
ある日　森の中

クマさんに　出会った

花咲く森の道

クマさんに　出会った

クマさんの　いうことにゃ

お嬢さん　お逃げなさい

すたこら　サッササノサ

すたこら　サッササノサ

とごろが　クマさんが

後から　ついてくる

トコトコ　トコトコと

トコトコ　トコトコと

お嬢さん　お待ちなさい

ちょっと　落し物

白い　貝がらの

小さな　イヤリング

あらクマさん　ありがとう

お礼に　歌いましょう

ラララ　ララララララ

ラララ　ララララララ

This is a song about how a young lady met a bear in a jungle and when i first heard it from a PSP game, it reminded me of childhood joy. It's akin to memories of me riding a horse on a merry-go-round or carousel in an amusement park with my parents taking pictures of me on the outskirt.

The melody is so uplifting and cheerful and I wanted to learn how to sing it, so Nobuko sent me the lyrics! Haha. :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bhB-YB6w1oQ

There are 3 children songs here and MorinoKumasan is the first song. Enjoy and relive those childhood moments!

And Mana just returned from Japan last Friday and she wrote me a very touching letter on a heart-shaped letter-pad. Again... brings me back to primary school days. Then I collected lots of different letter-pads and some of them even have fragrances! Haha! Oh yeah, and then I would exchange letter-pads with my school friends and my collection would grow! Those were also the days where good friends wrote letters to each other and I remember waiting in eagerness for letters from my friends and replying to them. Nowadays, email has become the norm, isn't it? Anyway, I was very touched by the letter. :) Thank you!

Friends

This morning, I woke up with thanksgiving in my heart. It was just wonderful and there is this very gentle delight in me. I reached the office, went to the toilet and was humming and singing to myself. At my desk, before the onset of IT problems, before the busyness and the harried looks, I read an email from Pamela. (http://www.xanga.com/pamelakoh) Emotions welled up in me and so many things that she wrote about challenged and encouraged me… Suddenly I found myself humming to the tune of Michael W. Smith’s “Friends”. Dear friends, have you heard this song?

Friends (By Michael W. Smith)
Packing up the dreams God planted
In the fertile soil of you
Cant believe the hopes hes granted
Means a chapter in your life is through

But we'll keep you close as always
It wont even seem youve gone
cause our hearts in big and small ways
Will keep the love that keeps us strong

Chorus:
And friends are friends forever
If the lord's the lord of them
And a friend will not say never
cause the welcome will not end
Though it's hard to let you go
In the father's hands we know
That a lifetime's not too long
to live as friends.

With the faith and love god's given
Springing from the hope we know
We will pray the joy you'll live in
Is the strength that now you show

But we'll keep you close as always
It wont even seem you've gone
cause our hearts in big and small ways
Will keep the love that keeps us strong

Well, I am not exactly thinking about friends who are going to leave but I am talking about having friends… Friends you know you can count on in your life. Yesterday, just yesterday, after work, I met up with 3 such friends separately and it was so good to spend quality time with them.

Here’s a bit of thankfulness I want to express to each of them.. :)

Ziwei has been a great friend and my mentor and leader and this one guy is REAL. No pretenses about him, no airs and despite being busy busy busy all the time, there is this confidence and calm he portrays. Hurhur… Last night’s dinner and coffee was really good. We just talked and talked and shared and shared and listened and listened and encouraged and encouraged. :) Sometimes, as we get caught up, so caught up with work, with commitments, the effort to consciously take time off to fellowship with close friends becomes sacrificial and very, very precious. Yet at the end of it, both parties will leave knowing that there’s been an imprint of the depth of friendship nourished and understanding deepened. That’s really what I felt last night on my way home. And this morning, I went online to ask him for a nice pict of him because I wanna write about him and hurhur… here are 2 pics he sent to me!! Dashing ne!!



















Graduation at SOT


Ziwei and Jelaine


Celebrating his bday at Expo!

And next up is Wanz. She’s incredible. She brings another quality of what a friend is TO LIFE. She’s a great listener, encourager, radiates energy and love and most importantly, she goes the EXTRA EXTRA MILE. I know people do walk an extra mile but to me, Wanli goes a few extra miles… Steve and I, and I believe, her close friends, can testify to that.

We met up last night to go to StarHub because she wants to subscribe to their student plan. She could get a new handset because of that but guess what, she asked me if I would like to get one free or discounted handphone instead. This girl is really a gem.



















At the airport with Wanz

And last of all, I’d like to share about Mr Goh. Haha, through Steve, I got to know Robin more and more and he’s one great, funny, solid, interesting guy. (Did I mention that he owns cafes too?!) He’s full of ideas, creativity and energy and takes his responsibilities seriously. One of my first impressions of him was when Steve visited me in Japan. Then, a typhoon was raging outside and Steve and I were at home atop my mountain.. hurhur and I was watching the telebe (otherwise known as TV) and both he and Robin were talking on the phone. I had NO IDEA that guys could talk for so long… It was revelational! It was a one-hour drama that I was watching and they were talking be4 the show… and still talking after the show… Really, they were like excited little boys, or little girls, yakking excitedly about everything!! Amazing and very amusing to me!

So last night, when Ziwei and I finally left around 11 plus, I called Steve to find out their wheareabouts (Steve and Robin and the security guys went to a wedding dinner). Heez, and Robin was sending them home and cruising through ECP when he heard that I was still at City Hall. Thanks brother… he turned back straightaway, picked me up and sent me home. Awwwww… so nice and so sweet and so 4 of us huddled in his branded van and I reached home before the clock struck 12.


Zhaowei and Robin

I dunno what to title my entry

セルーグルップの日は今週から変わった。木曜日になったから　金曜日の夜は暇になる。ね。。私は友達にまだ言わないけど　三月からフェデックスの仕事を辞めます。ね。。この決まりはいいかどうか分からないけど　私もあのしょうがない条件があるので　辞めます。ね。。。けどフェデックスに感謝します。実は最初初めてここで働いたとき　三日目くらいになって　もうすぐこの仕事が　私にとっては仕事の性質は内の性格と間に合わないと思う。職務の選択に際しては自分の適性を考えなくてはいけませんと思いますけど。。。今ね。。私は本当に大分にすごく困る。私はずっと先生の仕事をしたから　二十八歳で転職を大きく変える事は真剣に考えなけれべならない。難しい決まりでしょうね。けど私は本当に転職したい。

そういう大きな決断が私の頭に毎日毎日繰り返して溢れている。特に最近感情はローラーコースターのようにめまぐるしく変化させるものです。希望を持っている時、本当に信仰があり。がっかりした時　元気じゃなくなってくる。祈りたい時
神様に待ち望むときも　誰でも話さない時　私は本当に失敗なものと思う時も時々感想した。

けどいろいろな未来の不確かな状態があるけど　私は生活に諦めたくない。自信が無い時　失敗したとき　神様のみ言葉を信じる。私は物価の無いものは絶対無いです。私の全ては神様のみ言葉を造られた。神様はいい天の父だから　忠実な天のお父様から　私のことを大切し愛します。これは心から深く信じます。

今の気持も感謝の気持ばかりです。ね。。私は本当に今は文句は全然無い。聖書のヨブになりたい。ね。。荒野はもうすぐ終わると思う。相続の地に望んで一歩一歩向こうに見てイエス様と一緒に歩いていきます。

水曜日の日本人交わり奉仕である一つ歌を歌った。きれいな歌詞と思います。歌詞は意味深いと思う。今ね　私も大きい声で歌いたい！歌詞を覚えれてできるだけ全部書きます。：）

BREATHE

あなたは - Anata ha
近くに - Chikakuni
吐息のよう - Toikinoyou
み言葉 - Mikotoba
すべてを - Subete wo
造られた - Tsukurareta

あなたの - Anatano
麗しさ - Uruwashisa
我を捕らえ -Ware wo torae

Breathe 命の -Breathe Inochi no
息吹を - Ibuki wo
吹きかけ - Fukikake
生かし - Ikashi
わが避けどころ - Wa ga sakedokoro
主のみ翼 - Shu no mitsubasa
今求める - Ima motomeru

暗闇 - Kurayami
歌う - Utau
夜明けの歌 - Yoakenouta
哀れみと - Awaremi to
恵みを - Megumi wo
絶えず歌う - Taezu utau

日々あなたを - Hibi anata wo
待ち望む - Machinozomu
主の臨在 - Shu no rinzai
だけを - Dake wo
どんな時も - Donna toki mo
崇めます - Agamemasu
命の水 - Inochi no mizu no

の川溢れ流れる - No kawa afurenagareru

Yup, this is the Japanese version of Breathe, a really beautiful song that sings of the beauty, greatness, strength... the draw of God upon one's life.

And I just want to sing it out loud. :) Tonight, there is overnight prayer meeting in church and I am looking forward to it. Haven't had overnight PM together in a long while and I know it's going to be good. And tomorrow, I will be going to the inaugural airshow with Steve. Yay!!

And my good colleauge has reported sick today. She's very bubbly and cheerful, and she's visibly brightened my life here in the workplace. Koff Koff.. dunno if she'll be reading this while reading at home, but if she does, dearie, know that I'll be missing you loads and do have a good rest, drink plenty of water, eat lotsa veggies and get well soon!

Yup, and here are some pics of the Japanese fellowship we had.. DONUTS from Nobuko and lotsa Japanese snacks from Naomi!!

And presenting to you... Nobuko and Naomi. whahaha. I have lots to write about them! Another time k!


And here's Junko too. Met up with Junko on Wednesday for dinner at Bugis and then we went to Toast Box for coffee and tea. It was good chit-chatting and of course we got to know each other better. She just returned from Hokkaido and told me it was -13deg there. Gosh.. I think I'd just be a SNOW ORANGE if I'd been there.. but the pics that she took.. the scenery - breathtaking. :) She bought me this... They are very very delicious!! Shiroikoibito Chocolates from Hokkaido. These choco cookies are chouninki (超人気）in Japan and make very good gifts. Thank you Junko! :)